Wednesday, 23 September 2009

The Brede Hangeland link

To be honest, it fucking bores me.

Have you ever watched paint dry? Read a phone book from start to finish? Read this blog? Watched Arsenal under George Graham? Listened to a Spud going on about top four finishes?

It's all boring stuff but none of it bores me as much as the Brede Hangeland link.

Why does it still exist? They say (who says?) that there is no smoke without fire. Well, I say bollocks.

Brede Hangeland is not coming to Arsenal. I would bet all my life savings, my house and my 1992 Premier League Panini sticker book, which I might add is completed, that the giant American/Norwegian will not end up at the Emirates.

The geezer's agent, Rune Hauge, is trying to whore Hangeland about a little. A bit like an agent pimp. It reminds me of Felipe Melo's agent, who did the same in the summer.

Many agents use Arsenal's good name as a bargaining tool when;

A) They are either trying to get their clients a new and improved contract, which gives themselves a beautiful, even more beautiful than Megan fox, little bonus in the back burner,

or

B) They want to flaunt their players physique around, tempting clubs to buy the sexiness and in return gaining a lovely jubbly amount of money for doing the deed.

Most don't care about the player. Most just want their pockets lined. With cash. Loadsa cash.

It's funny how the link resurfaces when Arsenal are playing Fulham in a few days time. Coincidence? Methinks not.

Why would we need Hangeland anyways? I hear that William Gallas could be rewarded with a new deal at Arsenal and Thomas Vermaelen is by far the best defender that I, and Arsenal, have ever seen in our whole entire stinking existences.

I think the American/Norwegian is a good player but is one who would struggle at Arsenal. More often than not our two centre-backs are exposed more than Britney Spears' minge after a night out with Lindsey Lohan.

Hangeland suits a compact formation and you don't get a lot more compact than a Compaq presario laptop or Fulham.

He's staying where he is so please, please, please, PLEASE! Let. This. Rumour. Die!

Keep it Goonerish.................

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

Don't know what the fuss about him is actually. He's alright, bit of a lump. Would anyone swap him for Vermaelen or Gallas? Absolutely not.

I'd be more excited at the thought of Micah Richards signing, life-time Goon and perfect for the Wenger grooming academy.

Anonymous said...

No one cares about Hangeland now that we've got Vermaelen

jay z said...

i think a lot of people are getting carried away with this vermaelen guy yes he has had a good start to his arsenal career but his defending is still to be desired he turns his back on a couple of occasions rather then stay facing the ball and one clean sheet in 8 or so games now is still worrying

Anonymous said...

"More often than not our two centre-backs are exposed more than Britney Spears' minge after a night out with Lindsey Lohan"

One of the funniest lines I have ever read mate.

Wrighty7 said...

Jay Z,

I understand your point mate but I'm more worried about Manuel Almunia's form in those 8 games or so.

Wrighty7 said...

Micah Richards at Arsenal?? Would love it!

Anonymous said...

no to hangeland.
but a backup is needed for vermaelen and gallas, because Djourou is nearly out for the whole season.

giks said...

Varmaelen is the best ever? So far i agree the guy is brilliant my away shirt has 5 and the verminator on it

Marko said...

The thing about a new defender is that whoever comes in will be second or third choice cause Gallas and Vermaelen look so good together. Thats why someone like Tasci, Sahko or Subotic is more of an option because they're young. I also like the look of Zapata of Udinese for when Gallas does eventually leave or retire. Hangeland had one good season thats all. He's good in the air but lacks pace and we need that in a defender because the way we defend a high line. Hangeland is like Mertesacker big but really slow and rubbish really.

Anonymous said...

Arsenal problem is not the defense. Our problem is that the offense is not potent enough. We give the ball away too many times there by creating offensive changes for the opponent. If we keep the ball when our wing backs are on offense we will not have them racing back to defend every second time up field.

CescGod said...

''Have you ever watched paint dry? Read a phone book from start to finish? Read this blog? Watched Arsenal under George Graham? Listened to a Spud going on about top four finishes?''

Quality! Brede Hangeland is no doubt a good defender, but he is the main defensive guy at Fulham. Would he handle the pressure at Arsenal, playing at a high standard consistently? I have my doubts. I hope we do buy another centre back in the January transfer window, as Djourou is at deaths door. But I wouldnt worry too much if thats the case.

I was a little dissapointed Kyle Bartley never got a chance last night but he will get his chance, he looks a great player.

Good it up Wrighty, good blog. Not as boring as you would think :P

Wrighty7 said...

Cheers CesdGod! I try not to be boring. ;)

Anonymous said...

i understand that arsenal fans are so desperate for any cup/trophy thats why guys keep coming up with funny stories but for me, i have never admired that hungaland fitting in to an arsenal shirt/ squad like vammi and pliz i beg u wrighty to stop bringing this issue of hunga bse u may triger wenger's annoyance and he plans to disappoint me by bringing in hunga. i remain a gunner. BEENNY O

Anonymous said...

Already since the start of September we have been linked with Seven players. For some supporters that means instantly they must be very good, better than what we have and should be bought. If anyone saw Hangeland this week they must accept he had a shocker and is not as good as the hype. Hodgeson/Fayed are wiley foxes and have built his price up. They are in no hurry to offer him the new contract always mentioned.

herman said...

Micah Richards??? Do you guys have any idea about football and defending.

The guys on his last legs at city, and you want him for Arsenal? over Sagna!!

Please don't tell me for centre back either - did u c him play there for city last yr, jesus!

Anonymous said...

Richarde Dunn would be an awsome signing.

Anonymous said...

The season is just under way and we are already talking about new januari signings.

Sad to see that some blogs need this nonsense to stay alive.

Glad Wrighty puts a spot on it. But I would have loved a more outspoken post on the whole carousel of ridiculous rumours.

DutchGooner10

Pritpal said...

Thomas Vermaelen!!! much better then this clown and he was much cheaper!!! Thomas Vermaelen!!!! top scorer!

Anonymous said...

He is not american. He was simply just borned there by norwegian parents :-) He has lived in Norway almost since birth from when he moved to Danish giants FK KĂžbenhavn :-)

Anonymous said...

Besides, who needs Brede Hangeland (Or Andre Hanglestad as John Carew called him when he first came into the national teams - Carew is notorious for being bad with names) when we got the Nemanja Vidic of Belgium?

Anonymous said...

Wrighty7: Why are you called Wrighty7? In sted of 8 I mean ;)