Wednesday, 30 September 2009

Why do we always have to dig someone out?

I've noticed something in recent times and I'll be honest; I don't like it. In fact I hate it. I hate it as much as that Jack Daniel's sauce I bought from Tesco on Sunday for £2.54. The sauce leaves a sour taste in my mouth and so does this.

I'll probably upset some of my fellow Gooners here but I believe it has to be said; Why do we always dig someone out?

Like Frank Lampard eating cake we are never satisfied. Last night, in my belief, Arsenal played some of the best football we are likely to see all season from any side and I include the pundits favourites Manchester United and Barcelona.

We tore Olympiacos a new arsehole. They aint no mugs. Sure, they've lost every game that they have ever played in their stinking existence in England but they aint no mugs all the same. I was drooling at times and that usually only happens when the chinese waiter brings out my BBQ spare ribs.

So instead of revelling in yet another superb performance from my beloved Arsenal I'm slightly down because some of us choose to bemoan a certain players performance instead of cumming in our pants at our excellentness.

I know people, Gooners especially, have a right to their own opinion. Mine is an honest opinion on all things Arsenal........Well I'll try! (see the banner on the top of the page) I worry though that sometimes we tend to concentrate on the negatives and not the positives.

In recent times some Gooners, maybe myself included, have resorted to digging out their own. The most recent I've noticed is Diaby. Now I know that Diaby can be more frustrating than suffering from impotence whilst Megan Fox performs a naked lap-dance for you giving it the come-on but it's something that has to stop.

We haven't gone as far as booing him but I'm beginning to feel the same kind of vilification building towards him as Bendtner and Eboue have received in the past.

Maybe Diaby senses it? Perhaps if we gave him more support then we would see the best of him? At times he is breath-taking, other times infuriating but he is what we got, so is the rest of the squad, and I suggest we get behind them.

Keep it Goonerish.............

Monday, 28 September 2009

Announcing record profits may release the fury in the future!

So there you go. We have got dough to spend. In fact we have so much dough I reckon that Kingsmill and Warburton are shitting themselves.

Now it's all good Arsenal announcing these record profits. In fact its fucking awesome. The problem though is Arsenal may have just kicked themselves right up the arse!

Of course the Arsenal board are probably feeling very smug sitting on their throne of world-record breaking profits but I reckon they have just released a time-bomb that could go off next May.

If, at the end of this campaign, Arsenal do not achieve success for another year then there could be a lot of Gooners going more mental than a Whitney Houston break-down.

After the stadium move I knew things would be tighter than Frank Lampard trying on an XXX Large wooly jumper but these announcements could make things very difficult for Arsene Wenger.

There have been grumbles from disgruntled Gooners over the lack of spending by the gaffer in the past. Now we know that he has got money to spend there will be many questions as to why he hasn't spent it to improve our squad.

I know Wenger believes in this squad even more than The Darkness believe in love but over the course of a long campaign it may become a little stretched. The quality is there. But I'd be a little happier knowing there was more quantity, with quality, too.

I actually thinks it's great we have a manager that cares about the future of the club and that Wenger will not skint us out but others won't see it like that. When you look at the money others spend then it can be hard to not feel frustrated when we never seem to use ours!

And we need to use it for the right reasons!

We all know that football fans have a short fuse. Arsenal might just have lit one that will burn until May and it has the potential to go ape-shit!

Keep it Goonerish.............

Thursday, 24 September 2009

People love having a pop at us- but we always turn up!

In the past, the present and I'm sure in the future, supporters of other clubs have often laughed at our expense because of a lack of atmosphere at our home games.

Laugh they may but at least we always turn up!

There was over 56,000 at the Carling Cup game with West Brom the other night. This despite the fact that everyone knew the average age of the side would be around 13.

Put this into contrast with the mighty Manchester United. They had a pitiful 51,000. Granted, they probably would have had 52,000 but I heard there was a pile up on the motorway from London to Manchester so it meant a lot of people couldn't make it.

The lack of trophies at the Emirates may be worrying in recent years but I have to take my hat off to Gooners. We always appear in our droves at the Emirates and away games.

Keep it Goonerish.......

Wednesday, 23 September 2009

The Brede Hangeland link

To be honest, it fucking bores me.

Have you ever watched paint dry? Read a phone book from start to finish? Read this blog? Watched Arsenal under George Graham? Listened to a Spud going on about top four finishes?

It's all boring stuff but none of it bores me as much as the Brede Hangeland link.

Why does it still exist? They say (who says?) that there is no smoke without fire. Well, I say bollocks.

Brede Hangeland is not coming to Arsenal. I would bet all my life savings, my house and my 1992 Premier League Panini sticker book, which I might add is completed, that the giant American/Norwegian will not end up at the Emirates.

The geezer's agent, Rune Hauge, is trying to whore Hangeland about a little. A bit like an agent pimp. It reminds me of Felipe Melo's agent, who did the same in the summer.

Many agents use Arsenal's good name as a bargaining tool when;

A) They are either trying to get their clients a new and improved contract, which gives themselves a beautiful, even more beautiful than Megan fox, little bonus in the back burner,


B) They want to flaunt their players physique around, tempting clubs to buy the sexiness and in return gaining a lovely jubbly amount of money for doing the deed.

Most don't care about the player. Most just want their pockets lined. With cash. Loadsa cash.

It's funny how the link resurfaces when Arsenal are playing Fulham in a few days time. Coincidence? Methinks not.

Why would we need Hangeland anyways? I hear that William Gallas could be rewarded with a new deal at Arsenal and Thomas Vermaelen is by far the best defender that I, and Arsenal, have ever seen in our whole entire stinking existences.

I think the American/Norwegian is a good player but is one who would struggle at Arsenal. More often than not our two centre-backs are exposed more than Britney Spears' minge after a night out with Lindsey Lohan.

Hangeland suits a compact formation and you don't get a lot more compact than a Compaq presario laptop or Fulham.

He's staying where he is so please, please, please, PLEASE! Let. This. Rumour. Die!

Keep it Goonerish.................

Monday, 21 September 2009

Arsenal's "cheating" is mega exposed but how come our mega "sportsmanship" is often ignored?

If you believe what you have read recently then you would think that Arsenal are a load of cheating bastards. Not the type of bastards who cheat on their missus but the type who cheat on the football pitch.

Say you came from Mars, just landed in England and developed an interest in football you would probably reckon that Eduardo invented the dive and that Eboue thinks he is the new Maradona.

I admit that Eduardo made the most of his incident, he went down easier than Paris Hilton does but Eboue's latest "cheat storm" is that he tried scoring with a volley-ball tactic only seen on Eurosport at three in the morning.

I know for a fact that Eboue DIDN'T try to cheat the other day because I did the same last week in my own football match! SHOCK SHOCK HORROR! WRIGHTY7 IN CHEAT STORM! Why did I do it? It was just instinctive. I wasn't trying to score, I just did it. I think it was because I couldn't be arsed to get the ball when it went off.

Now I know that Arsenal have ball-boys but perhaps Eboue went back to the playing days of his youth and just did what was instinctive. Trying to catch the ball because he couldn't be bothered to get it. We know he can be lazy. Wait a minute.....that's Song. My mistake.

Eboue may seem a little bit of a doughnut at times but I don't think that he is daft enough to replicate Maradona.............

Anyway, what I'm getting at is that Arsenal don't "cheat" or "simulate" anymore than any other club but of course when they do it is highlighted more than Manuel Almunia's hair. Why? Fuck knows but I'm certain that we show more sportsmanship than anyone else.

How many clubs would offer to play a match again because of an unfair goal? I'm going back a few years but remember Arsenal V Sheffield United in the FA Cup? We offered to to replay the match because United were harshly done by. Would anyone else have done that?

Last season Andrei Arshavin showed true sportsmanship when he was felled in the box against Portsmouth only to get up and wag his finger at the ref indicating it was no foul. Did we hear about that for days? Fuck no.

I suppose this is the day and age we live in but people must remember the good as well as the bad. Arsenal are more sporting than Sporting Lisbon. We are a great club with great tradition and if I see those little fellas from Mars then I will let them know that fact.

Keep it Goonerish..........

Friday, 18 September 2009

Is it me or does Cesc Fabregas look like a man with the world on his shoulders?

I hope I'm not making a mountain out of a mole hill here but I'm worried about our little darling Cesc Fabregas.

I hate to say it but I've watched him in recent games and he doesn't seem right. His body language and the way he is playing suggests that he either has things on his mind or he is just short of confidence.

It's obvious he loves Arsenal, he has said he is more than happy here plenty of times, but perhaps there is something just niggling away at the back of his mind.

It's hard to criticise Cesc because he is the skipper and the face of Arsenal football club but I think that maybe he has had his head turned slightly. I reckon in the summer, when on international duty, Fabregas was tapped up yet again.

Now I don't think that Cesc has to publicly declare that he is staying at Arsenal again, he does enough already, but I think he needs to have a serious thinking session with himself. If he is having doubts about being at Arsenal then he seriously needs to weigh up his options.

I'd imagine that the idea of playing for Barcelona is very attractive, especially for a young Catalan like himself. It's like Arsenal wanting to sign me or you as a youngster. Would a move to Barca be a good one for him in the next couple of years? I don't think so.

However good Fabregas is, I think he would struggle to get into the Barcelona side at the moment. In my opinion Barca have the best midfield partnership in the world. Of course Barca are the cream of Spain and Europe but I don't think Fabregas would be happy getting splinters in his arse from the bench.

Of course there would be hysteria in Barca at the capture of Fabregas but how long would that last? At Arsenal he is loved by Gooners and will be forever. He is the lynchpin at Arsenal, numero uno, and pretty much has the side built around him. At Barca he would be just one of the boys.

I understand he is ambitious, I know he wants to win things. He can at Arsenal but firstly he needs to shake off this "hang-over" and begin to show us the Fabregas we all know because if Fabregas is buzzing so is this Arsenal team. And a buzzing Arsenal are untouchable.

Keep it Goonerish..........

Wednesday, 16 September 2009

Jekyll and Hyde Arsenal CAN win things if...

We are more Jekyll and Hyde than the Doctor himself and I swear a few more of Arsene Wenger's hair strands visibly turned grey before my very eyes in the first five minutes tonight.

Have you ever seen that programme Stressed Eric? It's that cartoon about a middle-aged Englishman who gets very stressed out and his vein strangles him when he loses the plot. Wenger had that look about him. I honestly thought that he had a biro pen on his neck tonight. It was actually a throbbing vein.

That's what this Arsenal side can do to you. Stress you out. Badly.

I get stressed because I know that on it's day this Arsenal side can smash the shite out of any side in the whole entire stinking world. Yet on a bad day.......

Luckily for us we had the resolve to pull something out of the bag tonight. That's a good sign in my book. Okay we were two-bob for much of the game but we won. Had Manchester United, Chelsea or Liverpool won in similar fashion then we would hear how about the grit shown and how much character they have. Hopefully we hear the same for Arsenal.

Hand on heart I believe we can win things but only if we quit making the amateurish mistakes we continually commit. I'd say that we could have cut 90% of the goals conceded if we showed more concentration in our games this season.

Clearly this needs to be worked on. How do you improve concentration? Don't ask me but there has to be an expert in this field somewhere. Preferably a Gooner too.

Keep it Goonerish...............

Sunday, 13 September 2009

I actually feel sorry for Emmanuel Adebayor....

.....because he was obviously dropped on his head as a baby.

I often wonder if over the years he has developed a form of dementia. He seems to be very very deluded. I'm sorry if I offend anyone with dementia. Being compared with Adebayor may seem insulting but it is the only way I can describe his ramblings, especially his attempt at an apology.

I'd like to be the bigger man and say that I would accept his apology but I say fuck the prick. He doesn't mean it. He probably only did it because someone behind the scenes at Manchester City told him to do it. The reason? Probably to try and prevent the FA from punishing him in a major way.

He has to be punished. What he did was plain stupid and you have to ask what sort of a role model he is. Why run the whole length of the pitch and celebrate in front of us like that? It was pure provocation and that is the bottom line. I don't care that he was emotional, he had to time to think to himself whilst he ran like Forrest Gump that it would be a stupid thing to do.

As for his stamp/kick out/assault on RVP, he didn't mean that either. It was his football boot's fault you see. It has a mind of it's own. It decided that it didn't like the look of RVP's face and unfortunately for Adebayor it was attached to his foot hence the reason it's seems that Ade stamped/kicked/assaulted poor Robin's boat race.

It's funny how life works out isn't it? Going back a couple of years I would never have believed that Adebayor would ever be this hated by Gooners but it is all his own doing. Not in his little mind of course but that is the dementia-related disease or the dropping on his head as a baby kicking in.

Karma is a funny thing and I'm a firm believer in what goes around comes around. Adebayor will get his comeuppance for his antics yesterday and although I'm sure that many Manchester City fans have taken him to their hearts and enjoyed his shenanigans I do have some advice for them; it won't last.

The geezer is trouble and that has been proved at every club he has played for, not forgetting the grief he has caused the Togo national coach in the past too. I'm 100% confident that he will cause Manchester City the same kind of grief he has caused us and all the other clubs he has been with.

Keep it Goonerish..............

Thursday, 10 September 2009

I cheered more when Eduardo scored than when England did!

I'm glad that Eduardo scored. Proper glad. That geezer does not deserve any of the treatment he is getting at the moment.

Yep, he went down easier than Audley Harrison against Celtic but you would have thought the Crozillian invented diving the way everyone is going on.

People in the pub asked why I was cheering Eduardo on. The reason? I'm more Arsenal than England any day and that goal was just a little pay back for the rough justice that he is receiving from all quarters.

Let me tell you something. If these donuts think that a little booing and jeering will affect Eduardo then they better think again. That man has been through more than they can imagine.

Eduardo had his leg snapped worse than a Kit-Kat and is lucky to even be playing again. Does anyone really think that the abuse will put him off his game?

I think I get more angry than he does and that is because I see the likes of Rooney, Gerrard, Drogba and many more hit the deck faster than 52 card pick up and it pisses me off that it is brushed under the carpet.

To be honest if this harshness on Eduardo banishes diving from the game then it can only be a good thing I suppose. My fear is that Eduardo has been singled out and that is not fair on him and Arsenal.

Both will suffer now because ref's will scrutinise whether Eduardo went down easy. It happened last night. Eduardo should have had a penalty and it was more blatant than the fact that Frank Lampard eats pies for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Anyway we'll see how things progress. Lets see if others are as victimised as Eduardo has been.

Keep it Goonerish..........

Monday, 7 September 2009

John Terry and Wayne Rooney should take a leaf from David Beckham's book!

I always thought that David Beckham was a class act and my opinion of him has risen even higher after his comments about Eduardo.

'There has been far too much talk about diving,'

'No-one wants to see it and it is disappointing when it happens. But it happens every week and Eduardo is not the first person to have done it.

'The whole thing should be put to bed.'

'Eduardo is a great player. It is not that long ago that he suffered an horrific injury.
'You don't know what was going through his mind. He might have been trying to get out of the way of a tackle so he didn't get injured again.'

Beckham has taken a lot of stick in the past and I've no doubt that he will receive more in the future but nobody can deny that he is a great ambassador for England and football.

People like Wayne Rooney and John Terry could learn a lot from David Beckham. The pair sat in front of the English media and spoke so much shite it was unbelievable.

I pissed my pants at the hypocrisy of John Terry and I cried real tears at Wayne Rooney's attempts to talk down his diving in the past.

Yes, Eduardo went down easy! But hasn't Rooney gone down easily TWICE in the space of a week? I must be bloody blind if he aint!

Beckham has spoke the truth and I praise him for what he has had to say on the situation. He may not be everyone's cup of tea but he is the first English player to come out with something that is very true.

Not like a certain Mr Terry or a Mr Rooney.

The story should be put to bed. If it isn't then Wayne Rooney's diving should get the same coverage. Shamefully it won't be.

Keep it Goonerish...............

Thursday, 3 September 2009

I have no hesitation in saying this

Thomas Vermaelen could be the biggest signing we have made in a long time. There I've said it and I aint taking it back!

Arsenal have been crying out for a dominant defender since the Stone Age. Well, it seems that long ago since Tony Adams, Sol Campbell, Martin Keown and co were the defensive lynch pins of the side.

It maybe early days but I'm very impressive by our new Belgian signing and I reckon he has the potential to be as much of a defensive rock as any of the players I have mentioned.

Not only has he impressed me but he has settled into the defence like he has been at the club for years. Not many take to the EPL straight away and Vermaelen has taken to it like I took to Budweiser.

William Gallas was in inspired form last season but even he has raised the bar this campaign. He loves to play alongside a partner who attacks the ball. Vermaelen attacks the ball better than Charles Bronson attacks screws in the nick.

Gallas is playing with a smile on his face and I think Thomas Vermaelen can take some responsibility for this. This is only a good thing for Arsenal and the pair are hitting it off quicker than Usain Bolt.

The signs are that this is as good as a defensive partnership I've seen at Arsenal for many a year and I think that the signing of Thomas Vermaelen could well prove to be the most important purchase Wenger has made in years.

No pressure Thomas!

Keep it Goonerish..........

Amazon is f**king amazing! Wenger should sue the bastards!

This may seem like old and regurgitated news but it needs to be said. Again and again if necessary!

Amazon are selling a song where Manchester United's supporters sing a sick chant about Arsene Wenger. Most of us who have been to Old Trafford in recent years know the song and in my view it is a fucking liberty that anyone would sing it, let alone buy it!

If I was Arsene Wenger I would sue the bastards. We know he won't. He is too dignified for that. But the simple fact is it's disgusting and immoral.

You can leave complaints on Amazon's site but you will probably get the same amazing response that others have received. Then again I suppose that freedom of speech is far more important than the nature of this sick chant.

The sick fucks and Amazon should be punished for this. Will they? Of course they won't. Arseholes.

Leave your complaints on

Keep it Goonerish............

Tuesday, 1 September 2009

It's time to get behind the Arsenal, our Arsenal.

There will many disappointed Gooners out there tonight. Disappointed because we haven't made any signings today or since Thomas Vermaelen arrived at the club. I can understand your frustrations. I would have loved Arsene Wenger to make a couple of signings too. But he hasn't. And I'm not that disappointed to honest.

I'm in the belief that we can achieve great things this campaign. I feel really positive, have done all summer, and despite the defeat to Manchester United, the start we have made to the season has given me even more reason to be so optimistic.

There is nothing anyone of us can do now. The dead-line is over and what we have is a very hungry squad eager to prove that everyone who wrote us off is wrong. There seems a togetherness amongst this group of players and they need to prove that Wenger's faith in them will not be unfounded.

This squad has grown together and despite the departures of Adebayor and Toure I actually feel we are stronger than we have been for a long time. As much as I loved Kolo Toure, Thomas Vermaelen has impressed me so far and in my opinion is an improvement on what Toure had to offer. They say success begins at the back, well for me, Gallas and Vermaelen have gelled very quickly and we have a much more solid look about us now.

Our new formation is serving us well. We press higher up the pitch and don't allow the opposition anytime on the ball. The 4-3-3 also allows our forward players to be more fluid and not so stagnant. They inter-change more freely and this is proved by the amount of goals we have scored. Yes, Adebayor scored goals for us, yes he was a plan B, but the goals are now shared throughout the team and this can only be a good thing.

Of course there is always the slight worry that we will suffer injuries to the team and the squad will fall short. My advice? Take a look at the Arsenal squad on Arsenal's web-site and there is plenty of quantity and more importantly, quality.

I really believe this is our year. Every summer we are written off and that surely will motivate this squad of players. There can be no more excuses. We cannot keep saying we are developing. And I reckon that time has finally come.

We can no longer be bullied, we have a hungry set of players, we have the best manager in the world, we have one of the best stadiums and we have fantastic support. Let's get behind this Arsenal team and I'm sure that we will be rewarded.

Keep it Goonerish..................