Thursday, 29 July 2010

It May Not Be Wenger's Fault!

There are a lot of frustrated Gooners at the moment. The main reason seems to be the lack of signings coming into the club.

Of course I can understand that because we need to strengthen the squad. Especially in defence where we are losing players left, right and centre.

I can see why people are beginning to panic but I don't think now is the time to do so. And I don't believe people should have a pop at Arsene Wenger. Yet.

If we haven't added to the squad by the time the transfer window closes then questions should be asked. But we have plenty of time to do so.

Many Gooners are beginning to question Arsene Wenger and his transfer dealings or rather lack of transfer dealings again this summer.

But are we targeting the right man here?

Of course being in the hot seat Wenger is there to be shot at. He is the easy target but he might be the wrong one in this situation.

We blame Arsene for not bringing players in but it isn't his job anymore to do so. That job is down to Ivan Gazidis.

Wenger targets the players he wants and leaves it to Gazidis to bring them in. If the CEO fails to do so then that is hardly the gaffers fault is it?

Maybe it isn't Wengers fault we haven't signed anyone and its highly unlikey he will come out and say anything. He has always been honourable to Arsenal and his employers.

I'd said before bringing David Dein back could be the answer but I doubt that could happen and I don't think he will be welcomed back. A real shame.

Keep it Goonerish............

Tuesday, 27 July 2010

I Think This One May End Up A Little Bit Special

Marouane Chamakh is not a house-hold name. In fact he is barely known in most places.

He is known in France, and in the Shockwaves wet-look gel section at the supermarket, but probably most people would pass him in the street and not take a second glance.

He isn't a superstar and he didn't cost a penny.

Sometimes I wish he did cost some money though because I guarantee there wouldn't be as many Gooners out there having a quiet moan about Wenger not spending any then.

I think that if we had spent £15m on signing Chamakh people would be more optimistic about our chances this season.

It seems because we didn't spend anything on him the signing 'doesn't count' and because he was a free transfer it means Arsenal are going to be shit this season.

He came on a Bosman so a lot of people are already forgetting about Marouane coming to the club. I think that's good. Less pressure on him then. It will give him time to adapt to England.

And I think when he adapts he will become a special player. He has all the attributes to wreck the joint with our club. Become a folk-hero with the fans.

I reckon he will be the surprise of the season. Already I like him. Not because of a penalty in some pre-season friendly but because he has real quality and he has real quality whilst wearing an Arsenal shirt.

Keep it Goonerish........

Sunday, 25 July 2010

Trying To Rebuild Bridges Now Are They?

So it begins.

After a summer of pissing Arsenal off at every opportunity possible in their pursuit of Cesc Fabregas it looks like Barcelona are trying to begin peace proceedings now.

We've heard it all from Cesc's Barca DNA to his heart and little toe being in Catalonia already. The relentless bleating coming out of the Camp Nou about Fabregas 'going home' has been non-stop.

I think the main perpetrator has been Xavi. It appears that he has an obsession with Cesc Fabregas. He is a little creepy and his love for our skipper reminds me a bit of that film Misery.

Andrés Iniesta is another from the Barcelona school of charming Fabregas. Only now he is trying to charm Arsenal too.

“Cesc wants to be with us (at Barcelona), but he told me how close the Arsenal fans are to his heart,”

“He is a special player and I hope he wins the title at Arsenal this season. For them to win Cesc will have to stay fit and injury-free but he deserves to finish with a title.

“For all the work and effort he has put in at Arsenal it would be a shame if it was all fruitless.

“I have seen time after time Lionel Messi win games for Barcelona when the rest of the team have not been on form and Cesc can do that for Arsenal this season.

“Cesc is such a special player that he could carry a team to the title on his own and I hope he does it this coming season. It would be brilliant if Arsenal’s hero could lift the title as captain during his last season. I think that it would be fantastic for everybody.”

How lovely is that Iniesta fella? And there was me thinking he was a cunt. I was mistaken and all is forgiven. Not.

It's a little late to try and build bridges now Andrés my little cockle. You lot should have thought about that before you launched the biggest tapping brigade ever seen in the entire history of football.

If I was Arsene Wenger I would have two words to say to Barcelona. Fuck off.

Keep it Goonerish............

Tuesday, 20 July 2010

F*ck You Martin Taylor!

Well done Martin Taylor you big fucking sop.

I don't give a shit that Taylor was 'devastated' or 'didn't mean to hurt Eduardo' because he isn't 'that type of player'.

Talk is cheap.

The biggest fact is that lanky lump has single-handily ruined Eduardo's Arsenal career.

By all accounts Eduardo, our little Crozillian, is set to leave the Arse and I think that it is a real shame.

It's been clear for a while that Premiership football has become too much for Eduardo ever since he had his leg busted.

To be fair, its even amazing that he came back into football after suffering that 'assault' from a talentless wanker who without doubt was told to get stuck into Arsenal because 'they don't like it up 'em'.

See, that's the attitude mugs like Ryan Shawcross and Martin Taylor have. Get stuck in and break some fucking bones.

I don't actually mind sides getting stuck in, what I do mind is career-threatening tackles that players like Eduardo and Aaron Ramsey have suffered.

What makes me laugh is the World Cup final commentary team, people like Alan Hansen, going mental at Holland being more than brutal and not agreeing with it. That's fair enough.

But the same wankers like Hansen sit on Match Of The Day and watch teams kick the shit out of Arsenal week-in week-out and say its the only way to play against us.

Sure, a bit of rough is fine but damn right GBH is not. If Eduardo suffered that tackle on the street Taylor would be looking at 5 years eating porridge.

Because of this twat Arsenal are seeing a talented player leave the club and English football.

I reckon had Eduardo not suffered that injury he would have become the Premierships leading scorer within two seasons. That's how highly I rated him.

I'm gutted he is leaving us but to be fair it's probably best for Eduardo.

Get a fresh start and put the nightmare of English football behind him.

I'll always look out for Eduardo, a class act and a class player, and I wish him well.

I hope he score 30 goals next season.

Keep it Goonerish..........

Monday, 19 July 2010

Phil Jagielka?!

On a serious level can you really see Arsene Wenger bidding £18 million for Everton's Phil Jagielka?

I don't mean to sound disrepectful but in my opinion Jagielka is not even worth £10 million let alone £18 million.

The money that clubs expect for English players these days is out of control. It's little wonder most shop abroad.

I don't doubt that Phil Jagielka is a good player (not great) but he has just spent the best part of a year injured and not only that, hasn't ever played at the highest level.

Yes, I know he has played for England but the Champions League is the top level in football, not international football.

For around £8-9 million I'd say he might be worth a punt. Not for anymore than that though.

I don't want to offend but I think that some Gooners in recent seasons have been getting a little desperate for signings.

I suppose who can blame us really? Wenger rarely makes 'exciting' signings so we seem to get a little flustered when linked with players.

I do too.

Of course it's nice to be linked with big signings but for me Phil Jagielka, at £18 million, is crazy.

Just because we are in the market for a centre-back it doesn't mean that we will bid silly money like the amount I'm seeing.

I don't believe that Wenger will bid £18 million for the Everton defender. No way.

In fact, I don't see Arsene Wenger bidding £18 million for any defender. Ever.

Keep it Goonerish..........

Sunday, 18 July 2010

Karma Can Be A Bitch!

I'm not sure I believe in Karma. I suppose I do when I've done something wrong and I'm begging for forgiveness but that's a little out of order. Just using really.

I haven't had an epiphany and gone all religious or anything but if Karma is in fact real then I'm hoping that it will be a right bitch for Barcelona Football Club!

The way they have acted this summer has been a diabolical liberty and if anything deserves a slap in the face for their actions it is them.

Even now, after pretty much admitting defeat in their chase for our skipper this summer they are still saying he will be theirs one day.

They have the most outrageous audacity don't they?!

I think Barcelona's tactics in trying to sign Cesc have been scandalous and quite how they haven't been warned for doing so is unreal. It has been the most blatant of tapping-ups and if UEFA or FIFA had any balls then Barca would be reprimanded.

How can Barcelona and Real Madrid get away with this type of thing every summer? Basically they eye-up the target and tap away more than a tap dancer. And they often succeed.

Something needs to be done but it won't be. Unfortunately it appears that the two Spanish giants are above the law.

I think Arsenal need to be praised for how we have dealt with Barca. We have shown our class and in truth shown Barcelona up, portraying how much class they lack.

I hope Fabregas sees Barcelona for what they really stand for now. A bunch of mouthy cunts who don't back up what they started.

Cesc has been left hung to dry in this situation. I feel for him.

I don't think Barcelona really had any intention of putting in a realistic offer for Fabregas this summer because in truth, as daft as it sounds, they don't want him yet. They probably don't need him yet.

All they have done is put the thought in Cescs mind and they didn't have to do that.

Throughout Fabregas' time with Arsenal most of us Gooners have accepted the fact that Cesc would end up back with Barcelona and none of us would have begrudged him the move. Before this summer.

Barcelona didn't have to go through with all the shit they have spouted since the end of last season. He would have signed for them one day anyway.

All they have managed to do is piss Arsenal off, very badly, and any negotiations in the future will now be more tense than bumping into that ex-girlfriend you dumped by text.

I really hope, more than most things to happen, that next season Arsenal win the Champions League by smashing Barcelona in the final and that Real Madrid (hate them a little less than Barcelona) clean up the Spanish honours.

I also hope that Barcelona, with all their money problems, have to have a clear out of their squad and Arsenal sign Pique, Puyol and Xavi.

We wouldn't use them for football. We could torture them.

Before every home game we could hang them from a tree and fire cannon balls at them or worse for Puyol, cut off his hair.

It'll be good if Karma is a bitch for Barcelona in the future and get their comeuppance.

Keep it Goonerish..........

Tuesday, 13 July 2010

Halla Madrid!

I don't mind banter. In fact I indulge in a friendly bit of banter daily.

What Carlos Puyol and Gerard Pique did to Cesc Fabregas was not banter.

What they did was cuntish and showed a distinct lack of respect to Arsenal Football Club, Fabregas personally and the rest of the Spanish squad who do not play for Barcelona.

I don't give a fuck if they had each drunk 7 pints of San Miguel, 2 litres of Sangria, 3 glasses of Chinchon and were pissed out of their brainless skulls. There is no excuse for such arrogance.

Apparently it was a prank.

Excluding Pepe Reina, I'm sure the non-Barcelona playing members of the Spanish squad found it hilarious that their moment, their moment of World Cup triumph, had turned into a BarcaFest.

Yet again.

I hope Joan Capdevila is so pissed at the antics that he cuts off Puyol's hair in his sleep tonight. And his fucking cock.

These Barcelona people really do believe that their shit doesn't stink don't they?

The audacity they have shown over the summer in their pursuit/kidnapping of Cesc has been unreal. They have more front than Brighton. The total disregard shown to Arsenal is unbelievable.

I'm sure I read something earlier in the summer that Barcelona would 'respect' us.

Respect? They wouldn't know what the word meant even if it smacked them round the chops with a tooth-pick.

Also I've seen people have a little pop at Cesc Fabregas over this incident. Personally I think that is a bit unfair.

It's clear he didn't know what was coming. It's very clear he was embarrassed by the whole thing.

If I was Fabregas I'd have punched Puyol in his curly mop and pulled on Pique's beard but I'm not Fabregas am I?

You can tell by his reaction he didn't really know what to do. He wanted to get the shirt off quickly but you can tell he kind of wanted to laugh it off.

What I do know is that it must have been a very awkward moment for Cesc and I feel for him. A great moment in his life was ruined by a pair of arrogant toss-fucks.

How much more of this blatant tapping-up are FIFA/UEFA going to allow? It's becoming outrageous and the more FIFA/UEFA allow it to go on the more Barcelona will do it!

Again and again.

Despite hating Jose Mourinho I really hope that Real Madrid win La Liga next season and I'd love it if he began to tap-up the likes of Messi and co.

Teach those Barca cocks a thing or two!

Keep it Goonerish............

Sunday, 11 July 2010

Shay Given To Arsenal???

I may get this all wrong. Horribly wrong. More wrong than wrong itself but I'm hoping that the goalkeeping situation at Manchester City will benefit Arsenal.

Our former stopper Stuart Taylor has re-signed for Manchester City just 9 days after being released from them.

Of course at City Taylor is only a back-up keeper but the question is to whom?

Neither Joe Hart or Shay Given will be happy getting splinters in their arse by sitting on the bench.

So surely one of them has to leave and find pastures new?

Like most people I've suggester either Hart or Given would be great between the sticks for Arsenal. Fuck, even Krusty the clown would be better in goal for us than what we currently have.

Who is more likely to be available though?

I think Shay Given.

Joe Hart is ready to take the England number one shirt AND Manchester City's. He is the up and coming keeper whereas Given is coming to the twilight of his career (which is perfect for Arsenal).

It seems Arsene Wenger wants a keeper for the short-term, a couple of years or so, because he really rates that young Polish geezer we sent on loan to Brentford last season and won't want to block his progression to the first team.

Targeting Fulham's Mark Schwarzer indicates this.

I'd rather Given over Schwarzer any day. Or night. Or week. Or month. Or year.

Given would be ideal for Arsenal. A top-class keeper at the pinnacle of his career and I'm sure he would jump at the chance of joining us.

I've read somewhere before that he wanted to join us when leaving Newcastle United but Wenger squabbled over £3.40 or something.

I'm sure he would be cheaper than that now.

As I've said, I maybe wrong on this. I might have added 1 + 1 and got 3. Mathematics has never been my strong point but surely this could happen?!

Keep it Goonerish...........

Saturday, 10 July 2010

How Many Spurs Players Are In The World Cup Final?

The stick we Gooners take from the Spuds about Arsenal hardly having any English players always makes me giggle.

The stick we Gooners take from the Spuds about Arsenal not having any English players in the England World Cup squad always makes me laugh even more.

I've even wet myself on certain occasions.

That's something the Spuds are very proud of. Having several players in the England squad. But not just any England squad. The World Cup squad.


I'm actually glad Arsenal didn't have any of our players playing for our sorry excuse of a national team in the World Cup. We were an embarrassment.

How can the Spuds brag about it? What is there to boast about? Having a bunch of players in a side who limped through the group stage of an 'easy' group and then were hammered by our biggest rivals.

It was a shambles!

Sure, the Spuds could counter that Arsenal had a few players in the France squad who failed so miserably but the difference is we Gooners don't brag we had several players in the French squad do we!

What is the big deal about nationality anyway? Why do so many people moan about Arsenal having so many foreign players?

Of course there could be a xenophobic attitude to it, that's probably the main reason, but surely in this day and age that is almost wiped out. Or not.

When the England national team fail we look for excuses. Why do we English always do this? We never look to ourselves, we look to blame others.

Look at the latest shit we come out with. It was too strict under Fabio Capello at the World Cup. The players didn't like it whereas under Sven-Goran Eriksson it was too relaxed.

Why are we blaming others? The core of the players under both these managers is pretty much the same.

Both times this set of players have failed yet we don't look at them. We blame others when its clear our bunch of prima-doners have a massive opinion of themselves and aren't really as good as they think.

Bit like the Spuds. Bit deluded.

That's why I don't give a shit about not having any England players in the World Cup. I don't care because most English players are wankers. And the Spuds brag about it.

That's why England will never win the World Cup in my life. I'm 27 years old. I've got maybe 11-12 World Cups left in me if I'm lucky. Or unlucky.

I won't see England win the World Cup unless we have a major overhaul. We need to change our attitude and adopt the notions of our European cousins.

You know, the cousins who we think we are superior to. Hmmmmm.

The Spuds think they can take the moral high ground because they have more English players than we do. Why? It's an English league sure but so what?

I hope those English players did you Spuds proud. How many of them are in the World Cup final?

How many Arsenal players are? Yes, Cesc Fabregas and Robin van Persie maybe 'dirty' foreigners but they are in a World Cup final aren't they?

In fact, how many Spurs players have ever played in the World Cup final?

One has. Christian Ziege as a late sub. Arsenal could double that number tomorrow.

Keep it Goonerish.............

Wednesday, 7 July 2010

Who Knows?

It's no secret that Arsenal are set to sign the French defender of Polish descent, who has a dogs cousin that comes from Switzerland twice related, Laurent Koscielny.

In fact, according to this, it could even happen today.

Whatever the case I'm sure there will be a few grumbles about the imminent signing of him.

Listen, I know he isn't the big name signing who cost over £20m that most of us seem to want (granted that would be a nice statement of intent!) but lets reserve judgement on him.

I remember when we signed Thomas Vermaelen or when Manchester United brought in Nemanja Vidic and thinking to myself who are they?

Now look at them. Two of the best centre-backs in Europe. And that's no shit.

Since Arsene Wenger has been with us he has always made this type of signing. A relatively unknown player.

Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Its always a risk.

Koscielny is a risk. There can be no denying that but who knows what impact he will have?

Some of Wenger's risks have ended up being some of the greatest players to grace Premiership history.

Personally I would like someone else to come in at the back too. Someone with Premiership experience.

Ideally it would be great for Sol Campbell to stay but I think he is northward bound to Celtic and who could blame him for wanting to play regular football at his age? He won't get that at Arsenal.

I've seen Phil Jagielka's name bandied about quite a bit. Whether there is substance to that I don't know.

Do I want Jagielka at Arsenal? He's steady and can play in a couple of positions so as a squad player maybe but not as a regular. Do we need another squad player though?

I happen to think that Koscielny will begin as a squad player. Rumours he will be given the number six shirt mean nothing to me.

What good is a shirt number these days? It doesn't reflect the starting eleven.

If my theory is true, and Laurent doesn't begin as a regular, then it means we need a starting partner to Thomas Vermaelen.

I've suggested that Johan Djourou will be that man. Others have rubbished my claims.

Whatever the case, Vermaelen will be number one choice next season and he needs a partner.

My money is on Djourou with Koscielny as back-up.

Unless Wenger signs another centre-back and blows that theory out of the water!

Keep it Goonerish............

Monday, 5 July 2010

This Could Be His Year

Although I was gutted for Theo Walcott missing out on an England World Cup squad place I think in hindsight it is probably a good thing he wasn't involved.

Arsenal are that hated by the English media I have no doubt that had Theo gone he would have taken the blame for England's demise. Even if he didn't play a single stinking minute.

Sure, Walcott would have been devastated at missing out, especially when it seemed so sure he was going to be included, but the way England performed means he can prove a lot of people wrong.

After the season he had with Arsenal he didn't deserve to go to South Africa anyway. I know injuries disrupted his campaign but he struggled to show his potential when he played.

People have raised doubts about Theo Walcott and his ability. I admit I've questioned him at times although I try my best to get behind him because I want him to do so well.

He needs to prove those people, and myself, wrong.

This is a massive year for Theo Walcott. He is still young but this could be a make or break season for him.

I think he could be ready to finally explode at last.

If players like Lionel Messi rate him and managers like Arsene Wenger do then there must be something special there.

It's easy to criticise Walcott. He is an easy target but I really do believe he will have a great season for Arsenal and will get himself back into the England fold sooner rather than later.

This could be his year.

Keep it Goonerish...........

Sunday, 4 July 2010

Oh Triffic!

So old baggy-eyes from down the Lane says that he has spoken to Joe Cole and has a 'chance' of getting the former Chelsea player. Isn't that tapping up? I thought/heard that Joe Cole to Arsenal was a done deal?

I dunno. All this tapping up of Arsenal players is beginning to grate with me. We've had it with Cesc Fabregas and Barcelona all summer and now shit head thinks he can do it to us too! What is the world coming too?

In truth I think that Joe Cole will eventually end at up Spurs but I reckon Arsenal were his first choice, only there hasn't been any interest from us shown to him. That may sound like bitter grapes on my part but it's just a hunch I have.

During the World Cup Cole would have been surrounded by Tottenham players geeing him up to join them. Bit like Fabregas in the Spanish squad with all those Barca chums of his. If people are going on in your ear-hole all day telling you how great a place/something is then eventually you are likely to believe that. Or it could just piss you off. Probably.

Disgracefully (yeah right!) Arsenal had no players in the England World Cup squad so we wouldn't have had the opportunity to convince him the Emirates was the place for his future. I also have no doubt that baggy-eyes spoke to him during the World Cup as well and told Cole how 'Triffic' it would be for him at Spurs.

While I think that Joe Cole is a fantastic player and I admit I would have loved him at Arsenal, I'm not going to shed any tears if he joins Spurs. Sure they will think they have got one over us but have they really? How could they if Wenger had no interest in signing him anyway?

It's going to continue to be a crazy summer on the transfer front for Arsenal. We will be linked to every Tom, Dick and Harry. Most of these Tom, Dick and Harry's agents are just using Arsenal's name to win new contracts or gauge interest elsewhere so take every bit of transfer rumour with a pinch of salt. Or you will end up crazy. More crazy than William Gallas. Man I love William Gallas. He's on a free isn't he? Let's get him.

Keep it Goonerish..............

Thursday, 1 July 2010


Hurrah! Super-Duper! Cushty!

These are just a few words that came to mind when I saw the new Arsenal home kit earlier today.

I'm always rather excited when we release a new home strip but I have to say that quite often in the past I've not liked it and felt rather let down by it.

That's Nike for ya though eh?

To be honest, I wanted us to jog Nike on and get Hi-Tec or Gola to design our kits. Maybe even JJB Sports. Instead we stuck with Nike and I have to say well done!

Nike have really outdone themselves with this one for a change and its about time after 16 years of the odd half-decent strip while the rest have been...........shit.

We finally look like Arsenal Football Club again and not Charlton Athletic Football Club which is quite a relief!

What a difference all-white sleeves make.


The question on most peoples lips will be; Is Cesc going to be wearing the kit next season?

I think so. Not just because of what he said today either.

In general conversations I've had with people (and status's I've had on Facebook!) I've always believed he will stay with Arsenal. At least for one more season anyway.

In fact, I was so sure he will stay that I announced everyone of my Facebook buddies could slap me round the chops with a fish from Billingsgate Fish Market if he left.

I extend that offer. I extend it to all the Gooners reading this blog today.

If Cesc Fabregas leaves Arsenal this summer I'll allow one slap, one slap only, to my face with a salmon from Billingsgate Market from each and every one of you.

Keep it Goonerish................